Today's The Day

It's on today,, the move. I still don't know where I'm going, but I'm going. It's come down to this,, I've got no more money to hold on to a place with such bad memories.

I suppose that this place has left me with some good memories after 19 years, but, in reality, the thought of living here any longer is full of bad memories and moments.

I suppose that in the end, the memories of bad far out weigh any good of having a roof over my head.

I don't suppose that any of you can understand. I suppose that's how the native Americans feel when forced to live on the reservation and not be allowed to live free as in the old days.

The thought of being confined in a prison is never as good as the reality of freedom. Peace until we meet again.

2 Days Left

I'm moving in 2 days and it doesn't seem possible, but it's true. I am going to move to a new area and start all over again.

I see a new beginning,, a new vision,, a new way of life.

I see freedom,, I see romance and I see adventure. Even when I'm homeless, I see these things for me. Wow.

I suspect that freedom is just a chance to live again with new ideas. I'll go there. Peace.

3 Days Left

I can not believe that in 3 days, I'll be moving,, going on to somewhere new. But I will be doing that.

I have only so much money and time left and then I will be moving. I am certain that in the end, the move will be beneficial, but in the meantime, it's difficult.

I am ready to go,, back to homelessness,, are you? Peace.

4 Days To Go

I have only 4 more days here and then I move. I don't know where I'll go yet, but I'm going somewhere.

I suppose that people who lose their homes can relate to this, but there is a great sadness coming over me and something isn't right.

I guess the people who know this feeling are probably in the missions now and probably don't remember it at all,, but I do.

I just want everyone to know that even you can be displaced and feel a great deal of sadness in your life.

Remember it isn't the experiences in life that are important,, it's the lessons we learn from them. Peace to all.

5 Days To Go

I'm down to 5 days until I move and I don't like this feeling. It's bad enough not knowing where I'm going, but then I know,, it'll be different.

I remember thinking about this when I knew the time I would spend here is running out,, I knew it would be a big adjustment to leave.

In my time here, I understand that sadness is just a feeling and there are many more feelings to come.

Hope you all have a happy holiday and remember to go to the shelter to feed the homeless, they need it. Peace.

6 Days To A New Feeling

It's 6 more days and then I be having some new feelings. I don't know where I'm going to live, but I'll figure out something.

I often wonder where I will go, but in the end, it doesn't matter, because the place that I end up living in will be different.

I must say that I do not like being homeless and I often wonder what the hell people think when they kill someone,, but that's their deal,, not mine.

Oh well, until tomorrow,, peace be with you always.

Moving On In 7 Days

I'm moving in 7 days. I don't know where yet, but I must move nonetheless. I am certain that the adventure is just beginning and not ending.

In the end, locations don't matter, it's the lessons we learn that do. Peace to all and happy thanksgiving,, even to those that have no food or home.

8 Days With A Roof

I have only 8 more days with a roof over my head and I'm feeling it.

I wonder where I'll land and what I'll do, but I know this,, I am free, are you? Peace.

Freedom While Being Homeless

I am free today. I am homeless in 9 days again. I make choices and I have boundaries.

It is rather interesting being free,, no home,, no commitments,, just free.

In the end, homelessness has its advantages,, being free is one of many. Peace.

Homeless In 10 Days

Well, it's only 10 more days and I'm homeless again. I don't know what to say, but here it is,, facing me.

I know that my time here is very limited and in the end, I must go. I wonder why people treat others the way they do,, then I realize that they were never loved.

In the end, situational living arrangements don't bother me,, not telling the truth does. Peace.

I'm Homeless Again

It's official,, I'm out in the cold,, the rain and the wind. I am losing my health insurance and I'm strangely okay with it.

I guess the ride is over and the reality is now. In the end, the feelings I have don't matter to those who have none.

I suppose I'll mosey along the trail and be present,, in the moment. Peace.

Homeless Song

I suppose that I, like everyone else I know,, has a song in them. I often wonder what song I sing and then I realize this song is one of awakening.

How is it possible to sing a song when you are without a home? How is it possible to sing a song when you are without anything?

I sing my song loudly so that I hear it,, no one else need hear it or feel it or even understand it,, I do.

In the end, my song is sung by me, for me, and about me. It is a song of my life,, not yours.

I hope that someday you will find happiness and joy and hope you remember that all you have can be taken away in a minute. Peace.

Homeless Poet

I begin to see transformation in my life. I begin to see awaking as I write and as I live.

Can I be free without the bondage of "possession chains" that tie me? Can I be free?

I write the feelings I have and I see the beginnings unfold in front of me. I am alive.

Oh hopeless mind, cluttering me to think, see not the day.

Feel the wind on my face and know the beginning is now.

Alive,, shout to the trees, lurk in "pretty people" land, stay not.

Feel free,, be present,, live.

May peace be with you always,, love life.

Old And Homeless

Today, I am old. I am near homelessness. I am feeling how it is that I am making this choice and then remember,, for me,, it is a choice.

At any moment my temporary "home" can be taken from me. At any moment, I can be back out there and then I remember, I'm old and homeless.

How is it my life worked out this way? How is it I am where I am? It is as they say, destiny,, or is it in the moment?

Old and homeless,, old and homeless. Peace.

Home And In The Moment

I'm in Houston today and I'm in the moment. I spent the weekend with a group of lawyers who work on themselves and are present.

I am amazed that I got so much rest,, I suspect that I did because I was with family and safe.

Did you ever feel bad about the troubles you have? I do, but sometimes I wonder if maybe, just maybe, the troubles I have are because I'm not in the moment.

In the end, whatever happens, home or no home, just be present in the moment. Peace.

Alone In A Crowd Of Pretty People

I'm all alone in a crowd of pretty people. I feel inadequate,,, with all these pretty people around me.

I wonder why I'm here,, yet, I feel that I am worthy of being here, even if I'm all alone in the crowd.

I suppose that most everyone at one time or another has not fit in,, yet,, I don't care about that,, I'm all alone because I see the pain of those "pretty people" trying ever so hard to fit into the herd.

I watch the leaders of the "pretty people" and see that when the rank and file leave for just a minute, the "pretty people" leaders make fun of those who just left,, (the non-pretty people).

When they return, the "pretty people" welcome them back into their group. I watch. I see. I feel a great deal of sadness for those "pretty people".

Is it any wonder I'm alone,, I don't wear the clothes the "pretty people" wear. I don't belong to the clubs the "pretty people" belong to. Yet,, I watch,, I hear,, I see,, and most of all I feel. Peace.

Fear Of Being Homeless And Alone

I often fear the biggest punishment in life,,, not being homeless,,, but being alone.

I sit with myself and listen to the wind,, but in the end,, I worry that I will not be loved.

I am worthy of love and I am not concerned about being homeless,, I will survive.

In the end, it is more important to love than to have a home.

I just hope that sometime in the future, life will reward me with a home,,, but more importantly,, I want to feel loved. Peace.

Home With The Tribe

I'm going to Dallas to meet with the tribe this weekend. At least I won't be homeless.

I often wonder if meeting with tribe members is the best way to ensure survival of an idea.

Anyway, for the price of gas, I'm going to Dallas. Peace.

Homeless Again Soon

I am going to be homeless again shortly. I see the end coming quickly for my short stay in Houston.

I guess in the end, being homeless is going to be a test again of my powers to survive and I feel like the ones on the streets become my friends.

I will no longer know the pleasure of a shower on a daily basis,, just the sponge bath.

I will no longer know the restful sleep,, just stress of keeping one eye open. I guess the journey I undertake soon will be the journey I have avoided for all of my life,, the journey to discover my instincts and survive. Peace.

I'm Going To Be Homeless Again

It looks like I'm going to be homeless again. Maybe, the crap that happens is just crap, but maybe it's the way it is.

In the end, homelessness is a real threat and I'm not dealing with it very well. Peace.

Homeless Breakfast

I'm running late and I'm very concerned that I won't get my breakfast. I often wonder what would happen if I miss breakfast again?

I'm just thinking,, that if you fuck with the bull, you get the horns,, whatever the hell that means.

Anyway, taking little steps is the way to go,,, sometimes, people want to take giant steps and they get no results,, taking little steps gets results.

My steps are simple,, I need to eat and eat I will. Peace.

Home Cooking

It ain't easy having home cooking when you don't have a home.

I have eaten beans out of the can and heated only a little bit from a fire I was able to make. It ain't much, but it is good.

I often say, give gratitude to the home cooking you get in life, you never know when it might stop.

Have a nice day and be kind to the homeless,, they might not have eaten today. Peace.

Homeless, Hungry And Blue

I'm hungry and I'll go get something to eat so why am I blue?

I guess that feeling blue is a way of expressing things that we all have,,, sometimes, it's happy, sometimes,, it's blue.

I don't know why I'm blue,, I just am. So today, I'll sit in the blue and just honor it.

Peace from the homeless lawyer who is feeling blue today.

Home And Feeling Safe

I remember the great feeling of being safe growing up where I had my home and family.

I understand the great healing power of roots and family.

What about those who are homeless? Do they have roots? Do they feel safe?

In the time I was homeless, and may be again shortly, I felt the insecurity and being alone. I was not safe.

Home is a safe place, a sanctuary,, not an abandoned building. Remember to feed the homeless, they are not feeling safe. Peace.

Happy Home That Is No Home

I remember what it was like growing up in a home. Now, I begin to wonder what it may be like without one and living?

Just when I get a favorable ruling from the bench,, "lawyer" tries to change that and no more home,,, it ain't right.

Oh well, I wonder at what price does it take to be an asshole? Is it worth the price to shout impressive crap to your client and then run and hide? More money for "lawyer" stirring the pot.

If I have no home,,, so be it. If I do,, so be it. In the end,, "crap" costs the client more and more and more.

Take away my home and begin battle. Peace.

Homeless Home

I fear the very thought of being homeless again, but it can happen. I suppose that being homeless once is enough to keep me on guard again for homelessness.

I do not feel very safe when those "Lawyers" steal the safe feeling I had leaving the hearing the other day.

I suppose that there is never enough to go around for users,, that they have always taken, taken, taken because no one ever stood up to them.

What will happen when I stand up? What will they do? Lie? Steal? Or will they understand the homelessness and be able to reverse roles with a homeless person?

In the end, those that know the feelings of the homeless, know the truth,,, those that don't are users. Peace.

Lawyer Trying To Make Me Homeless Again

I am upset at the lawyer who misstates the facts to the court. I was ordered possession of the Houston condo and now the "lawyer" wants me to pay for it. I can't. He is trying to make me homeless again.

I am sure the homeless feel trapped. First they get above the fray, then are pulled back by lawyers who lie.

I suppose that in the end, the condo in Houston will not get paid and be lost forever. I just want a place to stay,, is that too much to ask for?

Not Sleeping

I'm not sleeping very well in a hotel room while waiting to get back to trial. I "rented" this room with what little money I have and it shows.

Trying to sleep in a strange place, just brought back night terrors of sleeping on the bus stop bench of just a few days ago. It ain't pretty.

Anyway, I don't like this having to sleep in strange places and I'm off to Dallas for therapy after this trial.

Have a nice day and remember the trauma the homeless suffer,, I can tell you it's real. Peace.

On the Raod Again

It's off to the country I go to finish a trial and then it's off to Dallas.

I remember how it feels being homeless and living in a motel will be no different tonight.

I expect the trial to finish Tuesday and then I go to Dallas for the time of my life,,, therapy.

Have a nice day and be extremely nice to the homeless,, they are people also. Peace.

Sleep's Good In A Bed

I slept last night in a real bed,, not under a bridge or on a park bench and it felt good.

The problem I have though, is I keep waking up to the nightmares of my shoes being stolen and I keep kicking and kicking and kicking.

I wonder if being homeless hasn't activated an instinct buried deep down inside me,,, the instinct to sense energy while sleeping.

I know that is crazy, even earplugs don't help, but it is interesting that I wake up every time there is some noise or movement I sense.

Anyway, have a nice day and remember to help those less fortunate than yourself. Peace.